Santa's Slays

Searching for answers to his tortured, murder-filled existence, Barney Thomson is drawn to take a job in London, as personal barber to Thomas Bethlehem, the head of an upcoming and trendy marketing agency. Such is Barney's fate that, just as he arrives in the capital, a serial killer begins to run amok among the young, go-getting executives of Bethlehem's company. Suddenly, but entirely predictably, Barney once again finds himself in the middle of a multiple murder investigation. As Satan returns to haunt Barney and to steer him down his final, inevitable path, could it be that Bethlehem's latest client -- a wise-cracking New Englander with an easy smile and a handy ability with a thunderbolt -- is the man to provide the deliverance that has eluded Barney Thomson for so long?

The Final Cut is book 7 in the Barney Thomson series.

Praise for The Long Midnight Of Barney Thomson (book 1)

"This chilling black comedy unfolds at dizzying speed... an impressive debut novel." –
Sunday Mirror

"The plot, Russian literature fans, is a modern spin on Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment. The bloody ending, movie buffs, is pure Reservoir Dogs." – The Mirror

"This is pitch-black comedy spun from the finest writing. Fantastic plot, unforgettable scenes and plenty of twisted belly laughs." – New Woman

Praise for The Barber Surgeon's Hairshirt (book 2):

“A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” – The Sunday Mirror

“Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny.” – Daily Telegraph

“A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read.” – The Scotsman

“A flawless follow-up to an impressive debut, this is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” – The List

“Lindsay’s burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, classic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” – What’s On

The Barney Thomson novels in order:

#1 The Long Midnight Of Barney Thomson
#2 The Barber Surgeon's Hairshirt (aka The Cutting Edge Of Barney Thomson)
#3 Murderers Anonymous (aka A Prayer For Barney Thomson)
#4 The Resurrection Of Barney Thomson (aka The King Was In His Counting House)
#5 The Last Fish Supper
#6 The Haunting Of Barney Thomson
#7 The Final Cut

The End Of Days, a novella, can be read at any point in the sequence.

About the author:

Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, as well as the novels, Lost In Juarez, The Unburied Dead and We Are The Hanged Man. He lives in Somerset.

As Barney Thomson is closing up his barbershop for the night, an old man enters looking for a Cary Grant cut and a bit of a chat. The following day, Barney discovers that last night's customer appears to have been the captain of a fishing trawler found mysteriously abandoned on the Clyde over a hundred years ago.

In a sinister echo of the past, a trawler is discovered drifting in a flat calm just off the island of Cumbrae, where Barney lives and works. Of the three trawlermen known to have been on board the Bitter Wind, one is found dead on the vessel. The other two are missing.

As the ghosts mount up for Barney, could it just be that he is in an episode of Scooby Doo, featuring a lot of villains in masks? Or is it a real, dark and menacing evil which haunts his sleepy seaside town?

THE HAUNTING OF BARNEY THOMSON is book 6 in the Barney Thomson series.

Praise for THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON (book 1)

"This chilling black comedy unfolds at dizzying speed... an impressive debut novel." –
Sunday Mirror

"The plot, Russian literature fans, is a modern spin on Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment. The bloody ending, movie buffs, is pure Reservoir Dogs." – The Mirror

"This is pitch-black comedy spun from the finest writing. Fantastic plot, unforgettable scenes and plenty of twisted belly laughs." – New Woman

Praise for THE BARBER SURGEON'S HAIRSHIRT (book 2):

“A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” – The Sunday Mirror

“Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny.” – Daily Telegraph

“A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read.” – The Scotsman

“A flawless follow-up to an impressive debut, this is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” – The List

“Lindsay’s burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, classic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” – What’s On

About the author:

Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, which begins with THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON, and is currently seven novels and a novella strong. Douglas is also the author of LOST IN JUAREZ, THE UNBURIED DEAD and WE ARE THE HANGED MAN. He lives in Somerset.
 

At the end of MURDERERS ANONYMOUS, Barney Thomson's future seemed bleak. In fact, it seemed non-existent. However, for a reason that he can't quite get to the bottom of, he finds that he has a whole new lease of life as personal barber to the First Minister of the Scottish Executive. Unexpectedly thrown into the world of political intrigue and scandal, Barney's life is at least given some consistency when a serial killer begins to pick off members of the cabinet in a series of brutal (but very popular) murders.

THE RESURRECTION OF BARNEY THOMSON is book 4 in the Barney Thomson series.

Praise for THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON (book 1)

"This chilling black comedy unfolds at dizzying speed... an impressive debut novel." –
Sunday Mirror

"The plot, Russian literature fans, is a modern spin on Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment. The bloody ending, movie buffs, is pure Reservoir Dogs." – The Mirror

"This is pitch-black comedy spun from the finest writing. Fantastic plot, unforgettable scenes and plenty of twisted belly laughs." – New Woman

Praise for THE BARBER SURGEON'S HAIRSHIRT (book 2):

“A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” – The Sunday Mirror

“Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny.” – Daily Telegraph

“A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read.” – The Scotsman

“A flawless follow-up to an impressive debut, this is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” – The List

“Lindsay’s burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, classic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” – What’s On

About the author:

Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, which begins with THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON, and is currently seven novels and a novella strong. Douglas is also the author of LOST IN JUAREZ, THE UNBURIED DEAD and WE ARE THE HANGED MAN. He lives in Somerset.

"Silver bells, grey clouds, Christmas-time in the city. Sleigh rides on snow. Santa Claus and bright-eyed children. Mulled wine and mince pies. Tinsel on pine trees, snow falling on oaks. Mistletoe and indiscretions. Peace on Earth, goodwill to men. The baby Jesus, shepherds, the Three Wise Men, Bing Crosby and Perry Como. Ding dong merrily on high, hark! the herald angels sing, good Christian men rejoice. Turkey, sage & onion stuffing and roast tatties. Cold and frosty mornings, sledging on hills of thick snow. School's out, work's closed, cold feet roasting by an open fire. In the air there's the feeling of Christmas.

Of course, it was still only October."

So begins the third Barney Thomson novel, Murderers Anonymous, in which we find the most infamous barber in the world back behind the chair. Having handed himself in to the police and been rejected as 'just another Barney Thomson amongst many thousands', Barney returns to what he does best: handing out the finest haircuts ever seen in the western hemisphere.

However, in trying to come to terms with his murder-ridden past, he joins the local branch of Murderers Anonymous, bringing him once more into contact with the deranged, the criminally insane and the out-and-out sadistically naughty. In no time at all there's a killer reducing the population of Glasgow on a daily basis, and the hapless Barney is soon caught up in this tangled web of death, butchery and Elvis.

Praise for The Long Midnight of Barney Thomson

"This chilling black comedy unfolds at dizzying speed... an impressive debut novel." – Sunday Mirror

"The plot, Russian literature fans, is a modern spin on Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment. The bloody ending, movie buffs, is pure Reservoir Dogs." – The Mirror

"This is pitch-black comedy spun from the finest writing. Fantastic plot, unforgettable scenes and plenty of twisted belly laughs." – New Woman

Praise for The Barber Surgeon's Hairshirt

“A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” – The Sunday Mirror

“Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny.” – Daily Telegraph

“A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read.” – The Scotsman

“A flawless follow-up to an impressive debut, this is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” – The List

“Lindsay's burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, clazzic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” – What’s On


About the author

Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, which begins with The Long Midnight of Barney Thomson, and is currently seven novels and a novella strong. The Barber Surgeon's Hairshirt is the second book in the series, and Murderers Anonymous is number three. Douglas is also the author of Lost In Juarez and The Unburied Dead. He lives in Somerset.

Barney Thomson is a restless soul in search of a quiet town in which to settle. He thinks he might just have found it in Millport on the Isle of Cumbrae and life can at last bring him some peace. Or, at least, it might have done, but for the dead body at the bottom of the stairs, the ghost tormented for all time to go to the bathroom, the evil Chinese businessman, the disturbing package in the freezer, the mysterious cathedral, Barney's deaf, mute, hunchbacked assistant, the ancient society protecting a 2,000-year-old secret, the Vatican spies, the intended murder, the curious collective of ninety-year-old men looking for Robbie Williams' haircuts, the promiscuous vicar named Judas, the rookie exorcist, the volatile cheese sandwich, and the very outside possibility of Armageddon. And, at the end it all, twelve men will meet around a table and the very future of humanity will be decided. Either that, or they will go home for a cup of tea and a plate of chips.

THE LAST FISH SUPPER is book 5 in the Barney Thomson series.

Praise for THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON (book 1)

"This chilling black comedy unfolds at dizzying speed... an impressive debut novel." –
Sunday Mirror

"The plot, Russian literature fans, is a modern spin on Dostoyevsky’s Crime and Punishment. The bloody ending, movie buffs, is pure Reservoir Dogs." – The Mirror

"This is pitch-black comedy spun from the finest writing. Fantastic plot, unforgettable scenes and plenty of twisted belly laughs." – New Woman

Praise for THE BARBER SURGEON'S HAIRSHIRT (book 2):

“A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” – The Sunday Mirror

“Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny.” – Daily Telegraph

“A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read.” – The Scotsman

“A flawless follow-up to an impressive debut, this is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” – The List

“Lindsay’s burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, classic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” – What’s On

About the author:

Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, which begins with THE LONG MIDNIGHT OF BARNEY THOMSON, and is currently seven novels and a novella strong. Douglas is also the author of LOST IN JUAREZ, THE UNBURIED DEAD and WE ARE THE HANGED MAN. He lives in Somerset.

Barney Thomson is a barber on the run.

Notorious throughout Scotland as the most prolific serial killer since the Black Death, he has escaped Glasgow and the long arm of the law by hiding out in a monastery in the frozen far north-west.

However, as the snow descends, and the police slowly close in on his hideout, a new, vicious and altogether more psychotic murderer is wreaking havoc amongst the monks …

Praise for The Barber Surgeon's Hairshirt

“A mad, macabre romp with surreal characters and cutting black humour.” The Sunday Mirror

“Gloriously over the top, very bloody and very, very funny.” Daily Telegraph

“A novel which is both genuinely silly and a fun read.” The Scotsman

“A flawless follow-up to an impressive debut, this is extremely well-written, highly amusing and completely unpredictable in its outrageous plot twists and turns.” The List

“Lindsay's burlesque thrills offer no sex, no drugs, no desperation to be cool. Just straightforward adult story; fantastic plot, clazzic timing and gleeful delight in the grotesque. With more talent than Irvine Welsh could dream of, Lindsay has crafted a macabre masterpiece where content lives up to style.” What’s On

About the author:

Douglas Lindsay is the author of the Barney Thomson crime series, which begins with The Long Midnight of Barney Thomson, and is currently seven novels and a novella strong. The Barber Surgeon's Hairshirt is the second book in the series. Douglas is also the author of Lost In Juarez and The Unburied Dead. He lives in Somerset.

In the picture-perfect seaside village of Lady Helen, South Africa, Monica Brunetti has the life of her dreams--two adopted sons, fulfilling work, loyal friends and a special closeness with her former housekeeper, Francina. What's more, she's in love.

Then everything comes tumbling down. Monica's happiness is destroyed by a young girl's resentment. Francina, too, is plunged into grief. And a series of crimes rocks the village. Yet Monica must go on, as a mother and a journalist and a woman of faith--who believes, even in her darkest hour, that the risks of love are worth taking.

When journalist Monica Brunetti enters the town of Lady Helen, she is awed by its beauty. The picturesque South African village takes hold of her heart, especially the beleaguered residents of Sandpiper Drift, who are threatened with eviction from their tranquil neighborhood beside the lagoon. And so Monica packs up her laptop, her adopted sons and her housekeeper, Francina--who's wrestling with a major decision of her own--for the journey of a lifetime.

South African journalist Monica Brunetti had it all-- promising career, loving family, marriage-minded boyfriend. Then a life-changing encounter landed her in a hospital bed next to gregarious Ella Nkhoma, whose wit and caring challenged Monica's worldview. Their remarkable friendship would lead Monica far from the gated white suburbs, and toward a parting that left both women transformed-- and Monica the mother of two sons.