Scouting for Moyes - The inside story of a football scout

As former England striker and television pundit Jimmy Greaves famously said, football is 'a funny old game'. In A Load of Balls: Football's Funny Side, John Scally confirms the truth of his statement by providing a potpourri of double entendres, timeless quips and amusing anecdotes from the tongues of football's elite.

Hundreds of silly stories and priceless nuggets have been sourced to recreate the unique excitement, drama and unpredictability of football in the words of the sport's practitioners. The result is a wry, quirky and sometimes outlandish catalogue of comic creations. For lovers of the absurd, outrageous and totally bizarre, this selection of stories and quotes will amuse and delight.

Packed with priceless gaffes from the likes of David Beckham ('My parents have been there for me since I was about seven'), Bobby Robson ('We didn't underestimate them; they were just a lot better than we thought') and Paul Gascoigne ('I've never made any predictions about anything and I never will'), this hilarious collection is guaranteed to tickle the funny bone of even the most casual sports fan.

The penalty shoot-out is the greatest set piece of sporting drama ever conceived. Cruel, arbitrary, tortuous and unfair, it has also presented the England football team with a new and infinitely more punishing manner in which to lose. Three times in the past decade the nation has sat on the edge of its collective sofa and watched the seemingly inevitable unfold as Stuart Pearce, Chris Waddle, Gareth Southgate, Paul Ince and David Batty have selected the wrong shots in the lottery of international championship shoot-outs.

Except it's not a lottery. There is an art to scoring penalties, which calls upon a unique combination of physical prowess and psychological strength. In the corridor of truth that leads from the penalty spot to the goal-line, a succession of English footballers have had to confront not only the opposing goalkeeper but the hopes and dreams of fans and fellow countrymen and, of course, themselves. Score and few will remember; miss and - as the above list of names testifies - no one will forget.

Talking to some of the game's most successful players and managers, the question the book seeks to address is simple: can England overcome their fear of the penalty?

***FOREWORD BY FABIO CAPELLO***

Since their first appearance in the competition in 1950, England's World Cup story has been one of broken dreams, bad luck, shock losses and penalty nightmares, with one shining exception in 1966, when they famously won the Cup after beating Germany 4-2.

In Three Lions Versus the World, Mark Pougatch talks to those who have shaped England's World Cup odyssey, from Brazil 1950 when England lost to the amateurs of America, through the triumph of 1966 and the subsequent failure to retain the Cup in 1970, to the spirit-sapping quarter-final defeats in Japan 2002 and Germany 2006.

Household names such as Sir Tom Finney, Don Howe, Martin Peters, Trevor Brooking, Gary Lineker, Tony Adams, Glenn Hoddle and Danny Mills share their personal recollections of playing for England both on and off the pitch in the World Cup. Some reveal how they were affected by the demands placed upon them and by the mounting pressure of expectation from the English public. Others comment candidly on the myriad controversies to befall the England squad over the years. Massive highs are recounted and crushing lows painfully recollected. The contributors are united in the pride they shared in wearing the Three Lions shirt for their country in this most special of tournaments.

The players' stories and anecdotes woven around the narrative of the World Cup itself, this is an unbeatable, entertaining and enlightening journey through half a century of English World Cup action that no football fan can afford to miss.

True Storey is the compelling autobiography of notorious 1970s football legend Peter Storey, dubbed 'the bastard's bastard', who gained a reputation for ultra-violence on the pitch and had a capacity to find even greater trouble off it - a fact borne out by a string of criminal convictions and several jail sentences.

A key member, as their midfield enforcer, of the resilient Arsenal team that won the European Fairs Cup followed by the cherished Double in 1970-71, Storey was a confirmed ladies' man who loved a drink. In the mid-'70s, Storey's pub, the Jolly Farmers in Islington, became a magnet for north London villains and he rubbed shoulders with Great Train Robber Tommy Wisbey and Howard 'Mr Nice' Marks, Britain's biggest drug smuggler.

Storey talks candidly about the crimes he committed and the spells in prison that blighted his life. He reveals the truth about his feud with George Best and relays an astonishing account of how Bertie Mee tried to make him miss the 1971 FA Cup final against Bill Shankly's Liverpool side because the Arsenal manager wanted Eddie Kelly to start instead.

Today, Peter is an elusive character but a man transformed and at ease with life. Only now does he feel the circumstances are right to set the record straight and tell his side of a remarkable True Storey.

The FA Premier League was born 20 years ago, on 23 September 1991, and has since established itself as the most popular club competition in world football. At the start, however, there was opposition from the players' union and the Football League. Then the breakaway elite were faced with the exposure of the game's 'bungs' culture, which stained the reputations of Brian Clough and George Graham, among others.

After weathering that storm, the new league was threatened again by the very real possibility of financial meltdown, which was averted only by the controversial takeover of many top clubs by predatory overseas owners.

Joe Lovejoy reported on the creation of the Premier League for The Independent and revisits the story in Glory, Goals and Greed, interviewing many of the 'founding fathers'. Later, as chief football correspondent at the Sunday Times, he witnessed all the main events and has spoken again to those involved to shed new light on the best matches, best players and standout incidents of the Premier League's enthralling first 20 years.

While religion often violently divides the Middle East, the countries of the world's most explosive region share one thing - a deep and obsessive love of the beautiful game. James Montague travelled there for three years, observing the region's cultures and politics through the prism of football and interviewing all the major teams along the way. He soon realised that to understand the game there is to understand its people. For as much as football forms an unlikely common thread between different countries, the sport also reflects what is unique in the national characters of those who play, support and organise it.

When Friday Comes is an insightful and humorous account of Montague's journey, during which he gets stoned with the Yemeni FA, harangues Iran's Deputy President at the World Cup, has a gun pulled on him by genocidal Lebanese football fans, encounters a rioting group of fanatical young Jews singing 'I'm West Ham 'til I Die' in mockney English and was made to strip and then dance for the Iraqi national team.

This is a compelling travel memoir that will enlighten, surprise and entertain football fans everywhere.

West Ham United last won a major trophy in 1980, but the roller-coaster ride of the past three decades has produced enough twists and turns, heroes and villains and contrasting emotions to grace the script of the most thrilling TV soap opera.

Since Trevor Brooking headed home the FA Cup final winner against Arsenal, the Hammers have experienced delight and despair in not so equal measure, with a cast of controversial characters - either adored or abhorred - playing the key roles in a tale of fact rather than fiction.

The saving of the club by David Sullivan and David Gold, as West Ham stared into the financial abyss following the ill-fated Bjorgolfur Gudmundsson reign, is the latest chapter in a saga that includes numerous promotions and relegations, great escapes, contentious changes of ownership and management, internal feuds, bust-ups and power struggles, the Carlos Tevez affair and the passing of legends Ron Greenwood, John Lyall and Bobby Moore, as well as several false dawns in the endless quest for success.

Including exclusive interviews with key protoganists, Bring Me the Head of Trevor Brooking tells - for the very first time - the inside story behind 60 of the most significant developments at Upton Park in the modern era. Whether examining the contributions of Paolo Di Canio, Harry Redknapp and Frank McAvennie or Gianfranco Zola, Marco Boogers and Iain Dowie, the book celebrates the good, the bad and the ugly of West Ham United.

Football is big business and it doesn't come much bigger than Manchester United - commercial giants and the richest club in the world. But in the shadow of Old Trafford a black economy is growing to rival the commercial power of the official sales channels. Scum Airways is an inside investigation of the Manchester grafters - touts, black marketeers and shady dealers - who, led by characters like 'Big Tommy', have come up with a remarkably successful money-making venture: Scum Airways.

With the expansion of the Champions League came the opportunity for the grafters to move from ticket touting and producing 'unofficial' replica kits into the independent travel business. International Travel is the company for those who, through choice or because of their police records prohibit them, do not travel with the official clubs. Their customers include many 'straight' supporters of Leeds United, arch-rivals of Man U, but Tommy's core clients are the 'Lads' - die-hard 30-something football hooligans.

Scum Airways follows the exploits and adventures of Big Tommy and his team of grafters as they continue to build their empire. John Sugden went along for the ride and provides startling insights into professional football's burgeoning black economy. From Munich to Madrid, Amsterdam to Bangkok, through to the streets and bars of Toyko and Sapporo during the 2002 World Cup, and beyond, Scum Airways reveals the dark side of the football business.